18 Comments

I love learning you and your life in extended form. Such a beautiful read. X

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I hope we meet someday soon

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Thank you. Reading this gives me a sense of peace- in the knowing that we as humans collectively are seeking and learning and growing and ruminating.

If you haven't done so already, listen to Rick Rubin reading his "The Creative Act". I found it was both validating and eye-opening on every angle of the creative process. A good plane-trip listen coming back from Europe...

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I went through a phase in the spring listening to any podcast that had him on. I particularly liked Krista Tippet’s and the tension in Bari Weiss’ honestly. She kept trying to unlock the math equation of his magic and he kept resisting that there is a math equation. Love his perspective on taste too (“it’s subjective! Who cares if other ppl like it!”) - will have a listen for sure.

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Yes! I loved her earnestness and her questions were so different than any other interview with him. I got the sense that he really enjoyed her interview too. I will find Krista Tippet's now. Thanks!

One could say his theory relates well to your process of dressing- its your own magical intuition and taste- which we all here find mesmerizing and inspiring to influence our own.

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Bari Weiss 👁️👁️👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼so good

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It’s my dream to rent somewhere rural for a month, because I think you only have really get out of that jumpy ‘city’ mindset after 2 weeks. I’m glad you’re feeling the effects ❤️

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You know what the other thing is? If you are lucky/have managed to assemble a life you like (even though sometimes you need to escape it) Time away from the routine of it has the power to remind you how much you like it.

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Has anyone read The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron? A friend said it was helpful to get rid of the pressure and expectations we set out for ourselves that keep us distracted from being creative freely. It's a workbook.

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I did it the first summer of Covid — it’s more doing than reading although a lot of how she communicates and the ideas she shares are sharp and motivating. I would recommend it, it’s fun to do and if nothing else by the end you definitely come out feeling more confident about whatever creative output is calling towards you. It’s good if you’re going through a rough patch too - heartbreak or loss, etc. connecting to your creativity in those moments is the medicine

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If you ever get closer to answering the question of why some people require more validation than others please share. I too go from thinking I am hot shit on a unique path all my own to creating something that is shit only to seek some quick validation. A painful process. I like the way you describe praise to be cheap fuel to be used carefully. I will remember this the next time my need for validation takes me off my authentic course. Thank you for sharing :)

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I suspect there is no one answer fits all as far as validation and that a lot of it might have to do with early conditioning and how we each respectively respond to and adapt within the environments we are raised and when I put it like this, I think there is a survival element at play too. Like maybe achieving validation is what has helped those of us who need it survive our earliest environments. Or maybe we never got it so now we crave it. I wonder if there is also the thing though of those who are most innately confident not necessarily being as driven to accomplish or succeed because they already have the confidence. You know? When we desire success and accomplishment I think part of what we’re desiring is closer proximity to a higher self image

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Yes to all of this xoxo

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Expectations are a trap for sure, you end the year traveling, doing, and feeling good, then you fear the new year, what if this year isn't as good as last year?

Writing or directing a play, I have never cared about positive or negative reviews. In the case of smaller productions, you might be able to use the praise to sell a couple more tickets, but otherwise it is kind of worthless. You do what you do because that's what you are doing and want to do. I even had people once come to a show I did in a small theater, because a certain publication hated it. They figured if this publication that routinely tried to crush the efforts of original artists, didn't like it, it must be good!

Identifying where you are emotionally and in your mind is extremely hard, and that is why your column is such a good read!

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So curious, was it innate to not care about reviews? Have you ever cared about the response to or reaction to your work? What motivates you to create? It’s so nice to hear about the ins and outs of another’s process

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For sure when I was younger I might have cared about what people thought more, but as time went by less so. I noticed after a good or bad review you still needed to do the performance onstage, or find places to screen your film, in other words do the work. Then I realized it was the work and not the praise I craved. Now, I am almost suspicious of someone saying something positive or a good review.

I create because I need to, I do without pay and attention many times. It is just how I am wired. I would love to spread my ideas to a larger audience, but it is what it is.

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how to really let go

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Thanks for this Leandra! Loved it!💞

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